by Alexandra

Bittersweet is this ending —

I’ve been blogging here for almost three years! Crazy, isn’t it? I’ve had ups and downs, my life has changed significantly and I am an altogether different person. I know that sounds cheezy and silly, but it’s true. It has been an awesome experience, and it helped me realize how I am growing and changing. Blogging has also been an outlet for me, ever since I began.

One thing I’ve learned through blogging is that life is beautiful. Sometimes, not even the most skilled photographer can capture the perfect, beautiful essence of a sunset or a smile; likewise, I can’t always find the right words to describe my emotions, or a feeling, or an experience I had. Surely nobody else could, either, because those experiences, feelings and emotions are subjective to me — they are mine.

It’s been fun trying, though!

Alas, wordpress notified me that my my online media space is 99.1% full. Unless I start paying annual fees to expand my online storage, I will no longer be able to upload and post photos.

I am a college student. I cannot afford annual fees.

I love taking pictures, I love writing, I love going out in the world and finding happiness. I love sharing it, too.

A lot is changing this fall. I’m going to a new place, to experience new people and feelings and foods, a new sort of independence, a new sort of existence, a new life in essence. I’m nervous and scared and overwhelmed and terrified, but excited nonetheless. I know this sounds odd, but it feels like I’m going to be dying. Not in a sadistic or morbid way, but it’s like my old life is dying and I’m REALLY starting new. That means that so much of my old life is leaving — my bedroom, my kitchen, my “current situation” in terms of my study habits, what I do with my spare time, the way I view myself and the way others view me.

I’m an adult now.

So I guess what I’m saying (in the usual circuitous manner) is that I’m going to stop blogging. I can’t post pictures anymore, and that is a large part of the reason I like blogging. Considering that I won’t be able to afford to support the blog if I have to pay for it, and since my resources are ending, and my “old life” is ending, I figured that now is an appropriate time to say goodbye.

I didn’t want to just ditch you; I know that some people like to regularly read my blog, and I am so thankful for that! I love having readers! Blogging is cathartic for me, but it’s so special to know that other people are reading what I write, looking at my pictures, trying to experience life through my eyes. It makes me feel important.

This blog has been kind of funny, too. I don’t post much about my personal life on here, and so most of you don’t really know anything about me as a person (I think I’ve only ever posted a few pictures of myself!) or anything . But, you know so much about my life! You see my world through my camera lens, you taste my food, you “listen” to my ramblings and pick up my conversational lingo/personality by the way I write. I find that very interesting…you know ME without knowing me! It’s a sense of familiar unfamiliarity, an exposed anonymity…oxymoronic irony at its finest.

So, thank you, readers, for sticking with me through the pointless posts, the technological glitches, the grammar errors, the terrible picture quality (in the beginning, at least) and some of the silly things I’ve said.

Thank you and adieu!